Thriving Solo

Category: Uncategorized

  • Solo Isn’t Broken

    There’s a quiet assumption baked into so many conversations: that being alone is a temporary condition. That if you live solo—if you don’t have a partner, roommates, or a busy social calendar—you must be between things. Between relationships. Between phases. Between the life you have and the “real” one that’s surely coming.

    But here’s the truth: living solo isn’t broken. It’s not incomplete. It’s not the sad prelude to something better. It’s just one of the many ways a good life can look.

    I’m not anti-relationship. I’m not anti-community. I’m just done with the idea that being alone is a flaw to correct.

    When You Live Alone, People Start Looking for the Fix

    They ask if you’re seeing anyone. If you get lonely. If you’ve considered getting a dog, a flatmate, a dating app, something. The question behind the questions is always the same:

    “So… when are you going to stop living like this?”

    As if this was just an in-between moment.

    But this isn’t a placeholder. This is life. A real one. A full one.

    A Life on My Own Terms

    Living alone means freedom. It means not compromising on what you eat, how your home looks, what time you go to bed, or how much space you take up. It means solitude when you want it, and the power to reach out when you don’t.

    It means learning to trust your own rhythm. To recognise your own voice. To ask, “What do I want today?” and actually get to follow through.

    That’s not broken. That’s not lacking. That’s liberating.

    You Can Choose Something Different—But You Don’t Have To

    If one day I decide I want to share my space, or merge my life with someone else’s, I can do that. But it’ll be a choice—not a rescue. Not a fix. Not an escape from some supposed defect in my life as it is now.

    I don’t need to be saved from solitude. I’m not waiting for something better. This is better.

    Final Thoughts

    You’re not behind because you live alone. You’re not broken because you enjoy your own company. You’re not missing out just because your path looks different.

    This isn’t a waiting room. It’s your life.

    And if it’s working for you, you don’t owe anyone an explanation—or a change.

  • Things I’ve Stopped Apologising For Since Living Alone

    There’s a certain freedom that creeps in quietly when you live alone long enough.

    At first, you might still catch yourself doing things the “normal” way—habits built from shared spaces, compromises, social expectations. But over time, you stop asking, “Would someone else find this odd?” and start asking, “Does this make sense for me?”

    And somewhere in that shift, you start shedding little apologies. Not always out loud—but the internal ones. The ones you make in your head every time you reach for the thing that’s “not quite proper” or “a bit weird.”

    As you adapt to being alone, you start to shed the layers of masks you wear for the rest of the world. The true You can come to the fore, and if you look, you find things that you no longer feel the need to apologise for.

    Here are a few of mine:

    1. My Music (It’s Constant, and Not to Everyone’s Taste)

    There’s nearly always music playing in my space. Sometimes ambient. Sometimes unsettling. Sometimes a post-metal band no one’s heard of. Sometimes a live performance that’s more ritual than song.

    It’s not background noise for everyone, but it is for me. And now? No headphones unless I need them. No concern about volume unless it’s late. No apologising for the playlist.

    This is my space. It sounds like me.

    2. Talking to Myself (And My Desk Mascots)

    I don’t just talk to myself—I talk to the octopus on my desk. To the little raven who holds my lamp. To Baphomet, my satanic rubber duck. It’s part meditation, part brainstorming, part theatre.

    And when I’m gaming? I swear like a sailor. At the screen. At my character. At the AI that clearly cheated. There’s nobody to shock, so the filter’s off.

    Nobody overhears. Nobody interrupts. It’s strange, sure. But I’m done pretending I need to think silently to be functional.

    3. Eating Weird Meals at Weird Times

    Bacon and eggs at 3 PM. A single spoonful of peanut butter for lunch. Full roast dinner on a random Tuesday night. Toast for dinner because that’s what I want.

    I no longer explain my meals to anyone. There’s no “should,” no shame. Just food that fits the moment.

    4. Leaving Projects Half-Finished (Visibly)

    There are tools on the table. Index cards across the floor. An open notebook in the hallway. Because when inspiration hits, I don’t tidy. I build.

    I used to rush to clear everything away, just in case someone dropped by. Now, if something’s in progress, it stays in progress. The space adapts to the project, not the other way around.

    5. Skipping Showers (If I’m Not Seeing Anyone)

    A little gross? Maybe. But if I’m not leaving the house, and I’m the only one who has to deal with it, who cares? It’s not a daily occurrence, but when it happens, I don’t feel bad about it anymore. Hygiene is important, sure—but perfection is optional.

    6. My Mess (Is My Problem)

    Sometimes my space gets messy. Not in a health hazard kind of way—just that particular chaos of “I know where everything is even though it looks like I don’t.”

    If I’m the only one bothered, and not bothered enough to fix it, then that’s on me. No shame. No guilt. Just lived-in space.

    7. Being Quiet (Or Loud)

    Some nights I don’t say a word. Others I’m singing at full volume. I narrate my thoughts while I’m cooking. I play soundtracks that shake the windows.

    No apologies, no adjustments. Just presence. However it shows up.

    Final Thoughts

    Living alone doesn’t turn you into someone new—it just strips away the parts of you that were constantly trying to fit around other people. What’s left is a little odd. A little specific. A little wild.

    It’s also more you than you’ve ever been.

    Being yourself does not require an apology.

  • The Takeout Trap

    …How to enjoy your treat nights without guilt or breaking the budget.

    Ordering takeout isn’t bad, but it’s easy to fall into a habit where it becomes your default. If you love takeout but don’t want to drain your wallet, try these strategies:

    How to Keep Takeout in Check:

    Set a “Takeout Budget” Per pay period: Decide in advance how often you’ll order in—it helps control impulse cravings. Personally, I get paid weekly, and I have a limit of one per week. Do I ever go over that limit? Yup! No guilt, no shame. It’s a guideline, that’s all.

    Opt for Multi-Meal Orders: If you order takeout, go for meals that provide leftovers so you get more than one meal out of it.

    Maybe order the bigger portion, the larger pizza. That’s tomorrow night’s dinner (or maybe lunch) sorted as well!

    DIY Your Favourite Takeout Dishes: Keep simple ingredients on hand for homemade versions of your favourites (stir-fry, ramen, tacos).

    My personal guideline is that if I can make it well (and reasonably quickly) at home, I won’t order it in.

    I can cook a damned fine steak, an awesome burger, and decent pasta. If I order in, it’s more likely to Asian or Turkish food, or occasionally a really good pizza – all things that are harder for me to make at home.

    Pro Tip: Find a go-to, super-easy meal that you can make in 10 minutes so you don’t default to takeout when you’re too tired to cook. If you make it something you can cook from frozen, then there’s no planning needed ahead of time.

    How to Eat Well Without Overspending

    Eating well on a solo budget doesn’t mean sacrificing quality. With a few smart habits, you can enjoy great meals without breaking the bank. You can buy some things in bulk, and it takes very little time to break them up and repackage them before they go into the freezer.

    Some things don’t keep well, so you might struggle to use it all before they become inedible, so plan to use them all! It’s an extravagance, but you, my friend, are worth it.

    Simple Meal Ideas That Work for One Person

    When you’re short on time or energy, having a few go-to meal ideas makes all the difference.

    5-Minute Salad Bowl: Pre-washed greens + protein (canned tuna, tofu, or grilled chicken) + nuts/seeds + dressing.

    Egg-Based Dishes: Scrambled eggs, omelets, or shakshuka are fast, protein-packed, and versatile. As a bonus (as long as you can go without toast for your eggs), they’re protein-high and carb-low.

    One-Pot Pasta: Cook pasta, toss in veggies & protein, add sauce. Minimal cleanup!

    Taco Night: Keep tortillas on hand and use whatever protein & toppings you have.

    Rice Bowls: Cook extra rice and top with different proteins and sauces throughout the week.

    Air Fryer Favorites: Make crispy chicken tenders, roasted vegetables, or cheese crisps for a quick and easy meal.

    Pro Tip: Keep 5-10 go-to, no-brainer meals on rotation for stress-free cooking.

    Personally, my local supermarket does reasonably priced chicken skewers, and I buy them in bulk when they’re on special. They have a few flavour variations (satay and honey-soy are my two go-to options), and they cook, from frozen, in about 15 minutes in the air fryer. While they’re cooking, I’ll throw together something green (most often that’s a bunch of lettuce and some mayo), and spend the rest of the time doing a quick clean of whatever could do with a little cleaning attention. Then, when the air fryer beeps at me, it’s time to eat!

    I have found that I don’t have a huge need for variety, and I’m quite OK with cooking a four person meal and eating it for four out of the next five dinners. Maybe that’s you too, and if the worst that happens is that you’re a little bored with your meals for a week? So what?

    Final Thoughts

    Living alone doesn’t mean settling for boring meals, wasted groceries, or endless takeout. With a little planning and a few simple habits, you can enjoy delicious, affordable, and easy meals every day.

    Challenge: Pick one of these strategies and try it this week. Maybe it’s meal planning, cooking a double portion to freeze, or just adding one new go-to meal to your rotation.